Money Pick Up Lines

It’s not how much you earn, its how much you save.

Love of money is the root of all evil.

Don’t put your eggs in one basket, diversify.

If the investment is too good to be true, then it is too good to be true.

You cannot serve both God and money.

It is God who has given us the ability to produce wealth

fter a little restructuring let’s just I’d rate you a buy all day

Allow me to introduce myself: I am “borrower,” and you must be “lender.”

Baby, the way you support free markets stimulates growth in my private sector!

Baby, you’re not an option… you’re totally a future!

Before we do this I have to ask, what sort of tail risk am I looking at?

Call me your mutual fund, honey. Because with you, I’m showing interest.

Come into my office and let’s take a look at your statements.

Did I tell you I’m filthy rich and my mother’s dead?

Did you just rob a bank cuz I can be your getaway.

Do you have a bank account? You must! Im saving all my love for you.

Do you like to role play? I’ll be the banking industry and you can play the American people.

Future projections put you at overweight but I’m still saying buy tonight

Girl you are so hot you are like my LBO MODEL

Girl, are you a stock? Because you sure like bouncing a lot!

Good thing I just bought term life insurance… because I saw you and my heart stopped!

Hey girl, would you be receptive to my takeover bid?

Hey there, can I WACC you off?

I have a small penis, but a big bank account.

I have an emergency fund and I want to spend a little on you.

I hope I haven’t given you the wrong impression. I’m actually taller and richer than I look.

I hope you’re a bear, because I’m going to go down on you.

I just bought a bass boat with cash … and it’s a good thing, because you’re quite a catch!

I never co-sign anything. But I’d love to co-sign your marriage license.

I think you’ll find the delta between myself and others to be significant

I want to restructure you

I would like to pay with cash upfront and take our relationship further and faster.

I’d like to get you and your friends together for a comparables analysis

I’ll be your credit if you’ll be my debit.

I’ll be your debit if you’ll be my credit.

I’ll show you my forecast…if you’ll show me yours.

I’m what they call a deep value investor, with an eye for “special situations”

I’ve already kicked Sallie Mae out. Want to take her place?

If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, I’d be in a higher tax bracket.

Is that your pocket calculator or are you just pleased to see me?

Is your credit score bad? Because you look like a 10 to me!

Let’s get this IPO off the ground. Initial Penetration of the Opening, that is.

Let’s go make some statements together

Let’s just say I’ve been with models before and know all about their sensitivity tables..

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

I am DEBT FREE!

Now I can afford you!

The good news? I’m debt-free. The better news? I’m also date-free.

The ladies here would agree—I’ve taken the place of the paid-off mortgage as the status symbol of choice.

When I saw you, my jaw dropped like the value of a new car!

Why am I nervous about talking to you? Because you’re better than I deserve.

You look like a successful business woman, because you really know how to position yourself for me.

You must be fiscally irresponsible because I’m feeling inflationary pressure in my pants.

You seem nice, I just want to make sure you aren’t one of those FIFO guys

You’re a hot commodity.

You’re finer than the print on my credit card statement.

You’re so hot you could melt my debt snowball.